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kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

hunterofwesteros:

avengersuniverse:

Ever want to binge watch the Marvel Cinematic Universe but want to do it in chronological order? Here you go:

Captain America: The First Avenger
Agent Carter - Marvel One-Shot
Iron Man
Iron Man 2
The Incredible Hulk
The Consultant - Marvel One-Shot
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Thor’s Hammer - Marvel One-Shot
Thor
The Avengers
Item 47 - Marvel One-Shot
Iron Man 3
All Hail the King - Marvel One-Shot
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 01 – Pilot
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 02 – 0-8-4
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 03 – The Asset
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 04 – Eye-Spy
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 05 – Girl in the Flower Dress
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 06 – F.Z.Z.T.
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 07 – The Hub
Thor: The Dark World
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 08 – The Well
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 09 – Repairs
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 10 – The Bridge
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 11 – The Magical Place
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 12 – Seeds
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 13 – T.R.A.C.K.S.
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 14 – T.A.H.I.T.I.
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 15 – Yes Men
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 16 – End of the Beginning
Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 17 – Turn, Turn, Turn
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 18 – Providence
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 19 – The Only Light in the Darkness
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 20 – Nothing Personal
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 21 – Ragtag
Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Episode 22 – Beginning of the End

THIS IS IMPORTANT INFORMATION.

fakenasty:

OH MY GOD THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER

buttart:

animals-riding-animals:

wombat riding turtle

the animal kingdom is a strange and beautiful place

How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:

*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man: I never filled out an application.
Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Employee:
Man:
Employee:
Man: Fuck you, slut.

makaeru:

jeromeyromeyromeyromeyrome:

Australians get so confused during winter half of the population looks like they have 6 layers on and are ready to hibernate at any given moment the other half is wearing shorts and singlets saying “it’s not even that cold mate” every ten seconds

The best part is that these halves share the same space.

the-greasy-goatsby:

After 17 season’s of Pretty Little Liars, A is revealed and captured. The girls hug each other in a safe embrace, but are interrupted by the faint noise of a text. They read it aloud and stare into the distance, “It’s my turn, bitches -B”.

sadweens:

this party is invite only

©LB
The Key